Me: We have to learn all these psych meds and people are like omg I don't know which is which, I'm like, uhh hello lorazepam nice to see your name again old friend.
Liz: But you still have to learn the recommended doses. You had no clue about those!
Five years ago today I had to work the pre-carpet at the Grammys and left half way through the show because I was hungry and ate Taco Bell alone in my car.
Victoria’s Secret model Adriana Lima, in order to get ready for their famous fashion show, stops eating solids nine days before, drinks a gallon of water a day and twelve hours before the show, stops drinking liquids and eating entirely (“Sometimes you can lose eight pounds just by that!” she says!). Well, golly gee, is that ALL I have to do to look hawt in my granny panties?
This is a picture of me and Miss McIntyre. The blue is water and the brown is a...– One of the many cards I got from my 21 kindergarten students on my last day of student teaching. (via emac) Aw, your kids are so sweet! Students write the best cards when you leave. Keeping them in your desk and reading them later down the road will help you when you’re having a rough day....
That moment when you realize because you were too lazy to put the ~ above año in an e-mail to the Spanish teacher you said ano, which is anus. Yes. In fact it was a very good anus. Gracias for asking!
I’M GOING TO SAY SOMETHING REVOLUTIONARY: YOU ARE NOT YOUR AGE, YOUR WEIGHT,...– Hellogiggles editor Jennifer Still (via hellogiggles) I can’t take this seriously coming from a blog co-run by a spokeswoman for a major cosmetics company. Maybe when Zooey and all other actresses stand up for women and stop allowing themselves to be airbrushed in make-up ads and airbrushed...
My 87-year-old Grandma wants me to make an appointment for her to get a tattoo because she thinks the ones on my arms are so “neat” (had to use her awesome adjective here). Naturally she wants an Americana a la Sailor Jerry heart with arrow with her husband and best friend’s name written in it: “Bud,” on her forearm. He passed away this year after 60 some years of...
I've been in the U.S.A. for three hours and I've...
Flushed toilet paper (didn’t have to throw it away!) Drank tap water! Spoke English! Ate FOUR McDonald’s hashbrowns! Had a HOT shower! Did my taxes!
Left hectic Buenos Aires for the Northern Beaches of Uruguay for some peace and R&R only to arrive and find myself in the middle of one of the biggest parties in the world, Carnival! I wanna do ALL the drugs.
Observations on a Bolivian bus ride.
I arrived at bus station (and I use this term lightly, it was actually the side of the road in the middle of nowhere at some tiny restaurant) at 6:30pm in anticipation for the 7:00 bus. The bus naturally arrived at 9:20. We walked onto the bus and argued with whomever was in our seats because assigned seating means nothing here, sat down and realized that the seats must be made for children, yogis...
You know life is good when you’re twelve days into the new year and you’ve already read eight books.
I only have one resolution: find hashbrowns.